It depends on what kind of music you need. You can usually find free music on social networks or on forums dedicated to certain musical instruments. People often share their music there for free access.

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Your stiffness is understandable. I agree, I myself sometimes feel uncomfortable when they pay attention and brazenly poke at your shortcomings. A kind of outlet for me was playing on an electronic drum kit, read about an electronic drum kit here http://www.forumspielplatz.com/default.aspx?g=posts&m=111347&#post111347 As soon as I connect to my computer, put on my headphones, and start playing, I feel like I'm in my own world. The installation gave me unforgettable emotions and gave me confidence in myself and my abilities. This post was edited by Mark Bihdvin at April 12, 2021 7:35 PM EDT